Saturday, December 16, 2006


It's 11 AM. Cubicle two rows next to him is still empty.
Is she on leave today? Is something wrong?

She is very pretty. Atleast for him. The curly short hair, sparkling shine in the eyes... He found them very sweet. Very very sweet.

He could still remember the day he met her. In a team meeting.

It was raining. Heavy mansoon rain. He came late to the meeting. His clothes were wet. A sheepish grin on the face, He uttered a couple of words of apology...

"This is Sandhya, new member of our team..." Thats all he heard... He was lost in the worls where there were only him and Sandhya...

"This is Arun. BackBone of our Development team..." He came back... Again a sheepish grin...It took couple of seconds for him to utter "Hello..."

Just what the Doctor ordered. Training her on the new application became his responsibility. Usual "I-Hate-Giving-Training" guy took a U-turn to "I-Am-All-For-Spreading-Knowledge" Guy.

He took great interest in the training, in her, rather... Did she notice it?
She was bright. Training was over in a week. After that she seldom spoke to him.

It was just "Hi, Good Morning..."
"Hi, Hows work?" all the time...

He wanted to know more about her. Her interests. Her life. everything... anything...

"Are you alright Dude?" Question from the guy in the next cubicle...
Sheepish Grin again... "Fine, Just kinda sleepy... hehehe..." Stupid people, will never leave you alone...


No signs of her.
Even the code he was scribbling didn't show any signs of moving to the next line...

For too long he has been alone. But he is not desperate. He could wait.
For too long he has been waiting. But he ain't giving up. He could wait.

Days seem very long. Code that he needs to finish seems very long. The World is meaning less. Isn't it?

"Hi, Morning"... He looked up... there she was, wishing someone near the door...
That smile, Sparkle in the eyes, small sweat drops on the forehead... He came back to life. Again.

He smiled at her. She smiled back. He watched her till she sat in her chair.

There was Spring in the air. Suddenly Life had all the meaning.

"Oh there it is. Missing quotes..." He showed the mistake in the code to the Guy in the next Cubicle.

The Same story repeats every day. Will he ever ask her out? Will ever Sun meet Dusk?
Well, I just wish them luck.


stars, stars everywhere
Bright stars, Shining stars...
Small Stars, Big Stars...
Red Stars, Blue stars...

Will they ever Fall?
Will they ever Fly?
Will they ever Laugh?
Will they ever Cry?

Do they fight with each other?
Do they kiss one another?

Can you get me one star?
A tiny, shiny star for Me?

I need a star. I want a star.

I want to be a shining star...


I love being alone. Most of the time. Other times, when I don't like it, I cry.

I don't get attached to people easily. I don't regret that.

The Only living being that I've loved very much and miss is my dog "Danny". I miss it very much.

When my friends call me, then tell that they called "just like that", I irritated. A lot. Well, not many people call me anyway.

I probably stay alone at home, rather than hanging out with friends.
I don't like gathering. I get irritated at the functions, parties or any kind of gathering. I usually avoid them.

Well, the only gathering I like is Rock concerts. That reminds me, I am not going to the "Deep Purple" Concert. Why? Just like that.

I just now observed. There is too much of "me" in this post.

I know, I know. I don't have life.

I am a Creep, I am a weirdo...
What the hell I am doing here...
I don't belong here....

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

What is democracy?

The cerebrum has suffered massive and irreparable damage
You can never know what has happened to him
If I have not been sure of this, I would not have permitted him to live
Where am I?
What happened?
I need help
What is democracy?
What is democracy?
It got something to do with young men killing each other, Arthur
When it’s comes my turn, will you want me to go?
For democracy, any man would give his only begotten son

It is impossible for any severed individual to experience pain
Dreams or thought of any kind
This young man will be as unfeeling
As unthinking as the dead
Until the day he joins them

I don’t know weather I’m alive or dreaming or dead or remembering
How can you tell what’s a dream and what’s real
When you can’t even tell when you’re awake and when you’re asleep

Where am I?

I can’t remember anything
Can't tell if this is true or dream
Deep down inside I feel to scream
This terrible silence stops with me

Now that the war is through with me
I'm waking up, I cannot see
That there's not much left of me
Nothing is real but pain now

Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh please God, wake me

They kept my head and chopped off everything
Oh god, please make them hear me
They won’t listen, they won’t hear me
They got to wake me up I’ll be like this for years
Hear me

Back in the womb it's much too real
In pumps life that I must feel
But can't look forward to reveal
Look to the time when I'll live

Fed through the tube that sticks in me
Just like a wartime novelty
Tied to machines that make me be
Cut this life off from me

Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh please God, wake me

It’s like a piece of me that keeps on living
It won’t always be like this, will it?

I can’t live like this!
I-I can’t!
Please no
I can’t! I can’t!
Help me, help me, help me!
Mother where are ya?
Mommy, mother, I’m having a nightmare and I can’t wake up

Now the world is gone I'm just one
Oh God help me

Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh please God, help me

Me lying here like, like some freak in a carnival show
Here is the armless
Wonder of the twentieth century

Death has a dignity of its own
I need help
I’m in terrible trouble and I need help
Don’t you remember when you were little?
How and you and Bill Harper use to string a wire between the two houses
So you could telegraph to each other
You’ll remember the Morse code

Imprisoning me
All that I see
Absolute horror
I cannot live
I cannot die
Trapped in myself
Body my holding cell

It’s Morse code
For what?

Has taken my sight
Taken my speech
Taken my hearing
Taken my arms
Taken my legs
Taken my soul
Left me with life in Hell

What’s he saying?
Said kill me
Over and over again
Kill me
Oh god, please make them hear me
Don’t you have any message for him Arthur?
He’s the product of your profession
Not mine

Kill me
I’m asking you to kill me

Thank you

Save me please

Each man faces death by himself
Good-bye father

Inside me I’m screaming nobody pays any attention
If I had arms, I could kill myself
If I had legs, I could run away
If I had a voice, I could talk and be some kind of company for myself
How do I know they’ll kill me?
I could yell for help, but nobody’d help me
I just got to do some kind of, see how I can go on like this

S.O.S. help me
S.O.S. help me

Keep the home fires burning
While our hearts are yearning

Metallica - One

Sunday, December 03, 2006


No new mails in the mail box...
No calls from Mom...
No new blogs from my favourite bloggers...

Can't seem to find anything new right now...
Weather is very chill these days... I don't like it... May be because I don't have a single drop of FAT in my body :(

I seem to have a problem with eating. Either no one knows to cook better, or I, have lost all my appetite. Latter seems correct :(
Looking forward for "Deep Purple" Concert. I am not a huge fan of them. But I like a few songs.
"Smoke on the water" has one of the best intro riff in the Rock music :-)

Just listened to the song again, can't wait to for the *live* music :p
I need to explore the world